£9.99
Take away the insane lyrics and you still have music worth listening to – granted it sounds like Journey being raped by Ronnie James Dio but you have to admit that’s intriguing.
Their musical genius may have gone unnoticed by the wider public, like the full stop after the Dr. on a Dr Pepper can, but that simply makes it all the more appealing for putting on your Bose Wave whilst the quidnuncs stuff their faces with canapés and champagne at your summer shindig.
Their recumbentibus lyrics will not fail to offend virtually every section of society but will encourage tarantism, especially on a Monday after work. Some may say their inaniloguent lyrics are witzelsucht but you simply can’t fail to let out a horse like snort that will cause the cocaine you snorted at lunch with your clients, darhling, to come shooting out of your nostrils when you first hear “No Bumming”.
They sound like the Wurzels would if they weren’t from the Westcounty and the ting of the triangle will send shivers down your spine.
This CD will grow on you like E-coli on a room temperature chicken, callously abandoned in the toothpaste aisle of Asda, however, the only long term value you will get from this record is playing it for friends who haven’t heard it yet.
And a note on their live show – you do have to wonder if the band suffer from ximelolagnia.
Jacqui Murphy
For Whom The Bell Ends features all the hits, including: Scally Scally Scouse, Quincy (The Greatest Scientist Who Ever Live), Halal, Minge, No Bumming and many more.
At the risk of being sesquipedalian I have a few words to share - discovering raw talent has long been a forte of one's however, this new talent is a forte in it's own right. Forget Math Rock, Art rock and Citizenship/Life Skills rock, this is the new sound on the street; the sound of the underground, the sound that's making kids sit up and pay attention. Masticate the plethora of delightful melodies and i'm sure you'll agree - Scally Scouse, is the diamond that shines like a lone star on a wintry eve. There's something for even the most discerning music lover. Utilise your grey matter, purchase it and arrange a rendezvous with your sound system, chillax to the sounds of Mundo Jazz. You wont regret it - me , myself and I didn't
Gill Laidlaw
An overzealous Bez pigeon shitting on The Kings Of Leon whilst toting on the ashes of Kurt Cobain's curtain call grunderpants, this album is a McIntyresque epic of Biblical proportions fondled here and there by anger management classes and songwriters workshop, a must for those of you who invite the local OCD group round because you get your bathroom cleaned for free.
Darren Poyzer
SOME REVIEWS OF
FOR WHOM THE BELL ENDS
A great scouser said of this album, "Com ere you focken twat, I'll focken kick yer ed in". High praise to be sure, but is just an eructation? Whilst Colon's attempts at casuistry are refreshingly agrestic, the melodies are reminiscient of badger caught in a trouser press and the humour is as well developed as Miley Cyrus's fanbase. However, the presence of the glabrous, callipygian Rugbich Sisters is a mitigating factor, and I suspect that this album will even more successful than the Neverland Ranch Daycare Centre.
Mike Assenti
Having recently acquired (through one's top notch muscial associates), a copy of the latest work of Mundo Jazz, I can confirm that this is an ethically genius piece. Equality, human rights, and peace for all are the explicit underlying themes of the contributions of this masterpiece, which when collated, deliver a resounding epitome of the position diametrically opposed to that of verbal diarrhea. Full accolade to the individual contributions of these artistic swines. May they ride the horns of the devil of success with their heads and crotches held high
Louise Gallagher
Rather than waiting for pretentious reviews from music journalists, we ask our fans to write pretentious reviews! Let the metaphors roll!